Some women can be a bit scared of lifting heavy weights because they feel they might become overly muscly never really going to happen to the average woman, due to naturally having a lower amount of testosterone. Perhaps you could point out that gaining muscle improves your metabolism, allowing you to eat more freely without gaining weight. Try to point out the fun aspects of it, tell her why you enjoy it and see if she shows any interest.
Not sure about your routine, but guys tend to focus on the upper body, whereas females like to work more on lower body legs and butt.
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If you do get her interested in lifting, she might like the routines in Strong Curves as they are specifically designed for female bodies. Good luck! I think this is by far one of your best articles thus far. It is so well written, factual and highlights so many salient points that women who are trying to loose weight may face. For health reasons alone I think it is extremely important to be proactive and eat healthy, however I do appreciate how arduous that can be at times.
Thanks for the lovely feedback Charlene! Definitely agree with focusing on the health reasons — and I think your blog recipes definitely help with making healthy food choices here! But it is no use. I would suggest not hinting at anything in the future if she is shutting down; instead try and focus on something simple to begin with, like going for a walk with her each day. Hope this helps! This is a great article and everything makes a lot of sense.
My girlfriend is not terribly overweight, but she should lose pounds. The problem is that some of her medication has slowed her metabolism, so she has to work a lot harder and eat carefully… but she really enjoys food, wine, excessive amounts of salt, and soft pretzels. My schedule is way busier than hers and I find time to exercise, so she has no excuse.
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In fact, I go above and beyond to make her feel sexy. I truly do think shes sexy. But I would find her more attractive if she was thinner like she used to be. I also tell her not to fret about eating super healthy — just be reasonable. But she just eats and drinks freely every day. However, it did motivate her to eat better… for about 4 days.
Eventually, I will have to be completely honest with her that I want her to lose weight, but I am terrified that this will shatter her and damage our intimacy… What are your thoughts? Hi Jake, First of all, props to you for doing all the right things and not making her feel bad for how things are going. Can you try spending more time with her while you do your exercise? As in, involve her when you go to do exercise. The whole premise of this operation hinges on her taking her own initiative to exercise and then getting hooked on it herself. So can you find something that she already likes doing hanging out with her friends, or enjoying food and tweak those things so they are more healthy?
For instance, if she enjoys great food, how about trying out some healthy new recipes together? Or if she likes hanging out with her friends, somehow try and get her making friends with others who would do something like group fitness classes together. If you can uncover and change those meaning associations, you may be able to change her behavior. Wishing you heaps of luck! A few years ago my girlfriend had gained a LOT of weight quickly like 40 lbs in a couple of months. Fast forward and she has completely stopped working out.
I feel like the only thing that makes her work out is fear. How can I ease her into working out until she starts having fun with it, without having her be scared and feel bad about herself? I want this to be a fun activity we can do together.
Hey Jaison, Glad to hear that some of the tips did work at some stage. Also, how does she feel about this change? Happy, sad, or neutral? Essentially though, what you want to do is this: get her to associate positive thoughts and feelings with healthy behavior like working out or eating healthy. Look for something she really likes doing, or try to understand why she likes doing that task watching TV may be one of them. You may be able to subtly lead her back to when you two were working out together.
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You could always also use positive motivators, e. Have tried all of the above and still she around 20kgs heavier than me for th last 10years.
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I know we have 4 kids together which is hard. I suppose its kinda so much skinnier. It makes it so hard to just cuddle comfortably.
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Id be happy if she was more near my weight not even skinny because im a bit taller. Wont ever leave my wife but honestly it is just annoying. Would be happy if she consistently walked around th block just once a week. I said ill look after the kids. And done th cooking thing and try to go as a family but just is sooo hard to be consistent. What if she says no to your weighty conditions—will you withdraw the marriage proposal? Break up? The bride was at her lowest adult weight at the wedding and went right back up happily ever after and they are still married after more than thirty years.
She was very glad to accept the challenge if that was what she had to do to put a ring on it, and she was glorious and almost unrecognizable as a slender bride—but I found the whole thing very unsettling. In addition, losing weight and then gaining it back repeatedly may be more dangerous than simply staying at the original weight, not only in terms of various health risks from extreme dieting, but also because of a tendency to put back more than was lost.
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Years later, it had gotten to the point where they barely acknowledged each other, he says. Then, one day while taking a shower , Evans broke down and cried. At first, he says, his wife was hesitant to believe he was sincere, so she tested him.
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She told him to clean the kitchen , which he did. Though it would be a big job and he had a busy day ahead, he did as she asked. But Evans persisted. The first step to healing your relationship, says Evans, is accepting that you are as much, if not more, to blame.